Brian Wolle
04-26-2007, 01:21 AM
Wha Ah became a renacter
Ah jus needed to kill me some Yankees, but they don’t hav to actually dah. It’s good cause you ken shoot em agin next time around! Kaws there haint no good ones. They all hafta dah. Everything bad in this World, they did. Tops on the list: keeping us down. They are the Devil’s chief advocate on this planet! Well, planet’s probably the wrong word, but Ah don’t know what terminology God’s using at the moment. Garden of Eden Annex, maybe. Annex is good kaws it’s lahk right next door to the real deal. Lahk you ken put a glass on the door and heer what’s going on on the other sahd. I got mah eah tuned in most tahmes. You wooden beleev the stuff Ah heah! The “Coming End Tahms” and all that. If only the rest of humanity knew! Fire and brimstone? Childsplay. Nuclear Hollowcost? Amusement park ride. Such pain and torment can’t be described using earthly languages. Think of an ingroan toenail tahms ten, while someone informs you your dawter wants to marry a Yankee. Shoooooweeee! I know that wood send me out screaming into the back yard!
I had a fren whose dawter went and did that. She got x-communicated right then and there. Bye now. Don’t bother to write. Save ink and paper for someone else. Dispickable. Weren’t raised lahk that, I ken tell you. How could she not know?
A Yankee is the lowest sneak on the- let’s say the Garden of Eden Annex. Ha! Cawt myself. That’s good. Use the right wordology and the mind will follow. That’s what these kids need. They got freedom, freedom, freedom without responsibility, responsibility, responsibility. It almost ruined me. I was lucky. I cawt myself. Don’t worry, I was sure going the wrong path. It had sahns and everything saying so. What turned me round? Don’t know. I guess an angel tapped my shoulder. Yeah. Mah wife. Figgured she needed help. Ignoring mah own drowning self. All those bad behaviors the accursed Yankee foisted upon us God-fearing folk Ah diligently participated in. We got to talking and Ah showed her how this was true. It hit her lahk the first look in the mirror after a bad perm. Ahv been hornswaggled!
She’s a beleever you bet! Hates em more than I do, if that’s possible. Has shot more anyway. Those early morning tacticles, she’s up and ready and shaking me from a dead sleep dreaming about shooting the bastuds! Well, why dream it when you ken get up and actually do it??!! Convinced me. She slung mah acooterments over mah shoulder and we fell in. Got ten or twenty afore they got me. But they didn’t touch her, no sireeee. She must be made of cold steel. She ended up with three guys behind her loading while she picked them off. You couldn’t do nothing but admire it. It was lahk the loves and the fishes. An inestimable amount of powder was miraclised from the first few cartridges. Glory! Add that story to the good book.
The Good Book. Ah hates to say it, but Ah hav a problem understanding it lahk Ah shood. Lahk we’re supposed to think pagens wrong and evil and all for doing human sacrifices. Then they turn around and tell you God loved us so much he did what? Sacrificed his own son? Did Ah get that right? Must be a good thing then. Heck, they mean to tell you it’s the most glorious thing ever happened. So Ahm confused.
Well, it’s a mixed message lahk all Yankee propaganda. Those snakes wood hav us beleev the moon’s a rock floating in space. Well, Ahm into human sacrifice too. Look at all those Yanks can’t wait to move on to the next World. Ahm happy to oblige them.. Ah get points for all that. Ahm the high priest of sending Yanks to the Garden we spoke of earlier. It’s a sacrament Ahm performing. Mah soul must be as clean as Miss Maise’s Tuesday wash. Theirs too after I absolve them of their sins against Southern Humanity.
Well, Ah try. Shooting’s one thing, but countering all that propaganda is another.
Hope to see you on the firing line. Now you know wha Ahm there.
4/25/7
Ah jus needed to kill me some Yankees, but they don’t hav to actually dah. It’s good cause you ken shoot em agin next time around! Kaws there haint no good ones. They all hafta dah. Everything bad in this World, they did. Tops on the list: keeping us down. They are the Devil’s chief advocate on this planet! Well, planet’s probably the wrong word, but Ah don’t know what terminology God’s using at the moment. Garden of Eden Annex, maybe. Annex is good kaws it’s lahk right next door to the real deal. Lahk you ken put a glass on the door and heer what’s going on on the other sahd. I got mah eah tuned in most tahmes. You wooden beleev the stuff Ah heah! The “Coming End Tahms” and all that. If only the rest of humanity knew! Fire and brimstone? Childsplay. Nuclear Hollowcost? Amusement park ride. Such pain and torment can’t be described using earthly languages. Think of an ingroan toenail tahms ten, while someone informs you your dawter wants to marry a Yankee. Shoooooweeee! I know that wood send me out screaming into the back yard!
I had a fren whose dawter went and did that. She got x-communicated right then and there. Bye now. Don’t bother to write. Save ink and paper for someone else. Dispickable. Weren’t raised lahk that, I ken tell you. How could she not know?
A Yankee is the lowest sneak on the- let’s say the Garden of Eden Annex. Ha! Cawt myself. That’s good. Use the right wordology and the mind will follow. That’s what these kids need. They got freedom, freedom, freedom without responsibility, responsibility, responsibility. It almost ruined me. I was lucky. I cawt myself. Don’t worry, I was sure going the wrong path. It had sahns and everything saying so. What turned me round? Don’t know. I guess an angel tapped my shoulder. Yeah. Mah wife. Figgured she needed help. Ignoring mah own drowning self. All those bad behaviors the accursed Yankee foisted upon us God-fearing folk Ah diligently participated in. We got to talking and Ah showed her how this was true. It hit her lahk the first look in the mirror after a bad perm. Ahv been hornswaggled!
She’s a beleever you bet! Hates em more than I do, if that’s possible. Has shot more anyway. Those early morning tacticles, she’s up and ready and shaking me from a dead sleep dreaming about shooting the bastuds! Well, why dream it when you ken get up and actually do it??!! Convinced me. She slung mah acooterments over mah shoulder and we fell in. Got ten or twenty afore they got me. But they didn’t touch her, no sireeee. She must be made of cold steel. She ended up with three guys behind her loading while she picked them off. You couldn’t do nothing but admire it. It was lahk the loves and the fishes. An inestimable amount of powder was miraclised from the first few cartridges. Glory! Add that story to the good book.
The Good Book. Ah hates to say it, but Ah hav a problem understanding it lahk Ah shood. Lahk we’re supposed to think pagens wrong and evil and all for doing human sacrifices. Then they turn around and tell you God loved us so much he did what? Sacrificed his own son? Did Ah get that right? Must be a good thing then. Heck, they mean to tell you it’s the most glorious thing ever happened. So Ahm confused.
Well, it’s a mixed message lahk all Yankee propaganda. Those snakes wood hav us beleev the moon’s a rock floating in space. Well, Ahm into human sacrifice too. Look at all those Yanks can’t wait to move on to the next World. Ahm happy to oblige them.. Ah get points for all that. Ahm the high priest of sending Yanks to the Garden we spoke of earlier. It’s a sacrament Ahm performing. Mah soul must be as clean as Miss Maise’s Tuesday wash. Theirs too after I absolve them of their sins against Southern Humanity.
Well, Ah try. Shooting’s one thing, but countering all that propaganda is another.
Hope to see you on the firing line. Now you know wha Ahm there.
4/25/7